With a long holiday (Chinese New Year!) around the corner, your parents may be asking to meet your partner.
“So boy, when do we get to meet her? It’s high time we get to know this girlfriend of yours.”
“Girl, it’s time to meet him. Must see if leng zhai or not, got stable job, can talk to your father and not make him mad. I know, ask him over for dinner this weekend!”
Does that sound familiar? If so, then you may want to be prepared for an revved-up version as a long holiday is around the corner. For some families, meeting the parents is no big deal. For others, however, it’s as good as saying an engagement is coming soon.
No matter the circumstance, we know it can be daunting to meet a partner’s parents for the first time, and it’s important to not bend to the pressure and be truly ready as a couple for the ‘big introduction’. Here’s a simple 4-question checklist that’ll help you and your partner decide if the time’s right.
1. Do you feel secure about each other and the relationship?
Meeting the parents can be a big step; you need to be confident that your significant other is reliable, trustworthy, respectful and loyal. Have conversations with each other discussing future plans, goals and what the both of you hope to achieve as individuals and a couple.
Ask yourself if you’re secure in your partner’s love for you, and make sure no questions are unanswered.
2. Have you started talking about a future together?
Take a step back and do a self-check to ensure you’re both comfortable and confident in where the relationship’s heading. If both of you are moving towards a permanent arrangement and naturally using “us” instead of “me”, then a ‘meet the parents’ may be a good idea.
It’s even better if some of the ‘harder’ questions like marriage, home plans and career goals have also been discussed. That way, you won’t be caught off guard if a parent throws such a question over dessert!
3. Have you met each other’s friends, or better still, become their friends too?
It is good idea to meet your partner’s friends first before you meet the parents, because if you can ‘click’ with his or her close friends you probably will be able to handle the parents.
Although this isn’t a hard and fast rule, it often works because birds of a feather do flock together!
This is a simple but heavily loaded question. Both of you have to answer this honestly and without sugar-coating the truth before you arrange to meet the parents. If the both of you agree that you are indeed committed to one another, no matter what lies ahead, then it’s a great foundation for a permanent relationship to flourish.
And resting in that knowledge will also build confidence in the partnership, which is essential when meeting the parents. Commitment is key to any relationship, and your parents will see it!
Did we miss any important signs? Share with us in the comments section below.
Featured Image Credit: Sino Hotels